Leaving a Legacy, Part 2

So the question yesterday we decided that as parents we all needed to be able to answer is what legacy do you want to leave?

In our materialistic world, mention the word legacy, and people often think monetarily. However, if you are a parent, the greatest legacy that you will leave on this earth is not money or achievement or possessions, the greatest legacy is your children.

So, if you could get imagine how your kids turn out 10 or 20 years from now, what kind of legacy would you like to see? What is it that you want to show for this time and investment in parenting?

I think first what we need to do is back up the lens and see our children as God sees them.

Open with me to Psalm 127: 3-5

This verse is a snapshot of how God looks upon our children.

The reason we have settled in this scripture is because I want you to notice the word ARROW. We are told that "children are like arrows in the hands of a warrior."

When Solomon was writing this passage arrows were made by hand. Archers spend countless hours preparing their arrows. They carefully choose the right piece of wood, cut it precisely to size, then spend hours polishing, and fitting the feathers and the arrowhead.

As a result of the investment they would never waste the arrow and just shoot it in the air; they would shoot it to a very specific target.

I love the analogy that is used here and really it has several lessons on value of children and discipline, but what I want you to notice is that to leave a Godly legacy as parents requires positive, clear cut objectives.

It is like going on a trip. You are not going to get anywhere if you do not know where you are going or you are going to end up somewhere you never intended to in the first place.

We have to have an idea of what exactly we are aiming for.

As parents we are to take our children and mold them and prepare them so that when they are released they hit the bull’s eye. That means that there is a picture in your mind of an ultimate outcome.

Back to my original question...what kind of adult are you trying to raise? Remember we are raising future adults not future children.

I think if we were in a room together we would here a lot of different responses. Many of us, especially if we have been "churched" long enough, will say the noble thing about our children growing up to have a tender heart for God. As Tim Kimmel (author of Raising Kids for True Greatness) has said, "What happens when the actual target of our parenting priorities is scrutinized is that what often shows up is that, although we are followers of Christ, we are also products of a western mindset."

Tim Kimmel tells the story of visiting a man and his son whom he had been asked to come and give some guidance to because they were having a great deal of trouble with the father-son relationship.

This was a family that was living the American dream. The father owned a high end home building business and they seemingly had it all. Wealth, power, prestige. It was also a Christian home.

While spending time with this father and son, they were driving through a housing development which the father had some projects in .

The father was driving the car, Tim was in the passenger’s seat and the son was in the back seat.

As they came upon a house that was under construction, they noticed a laborer that was carrying bricks between the sidewalk and the house – delivering them to a bricklayer who was apparently building a fireplace on the inside. This father thought that he would use this as a chance to teach a lesson to his son, and he turned around and he said to his son, "You know, son, at the rate you are going you are going to end up like that. If you do not change your ways you are going to find yourself at the bottom of the food chain just like that old man, wasting your life and barely making minimum wage.”

The father then turned and winked at Tim as to say there – I taught him.

Tim didn't say anything right then because the son was in the back seat but once they were alone he turned to the father and confronted his mistake. He asked the father --why would you go and disparage that man who was doing a good service, and working hard for his pay? How do you know what kind of a man he is? Just because he doesn't make much money, how is that a measure of a man's true character?"

It is a contagious mindset. Oh yes, we WANT moral kids who love the Lord, BUT we also want to raise kids that are successful, do well financially, and make a name for themselves.

It is a slippery slope and what happens as parents is that we get caught up in this world view, this trap of raising children for success.